Bloody hell… (excuse the pun)

Since my operation last summer, I have to say, I’m pretty much back to normal.

I’m out walking each day (when it isn’t raining, obviously), I’m swimming (if only rarely, since the weather has been crap), I’m having a few beers, and enjoying life. Yes, I’m pretty much back to normal.

The only real change is that I need to have a blood test taken every week, to ensure that my blood density is as it should be for my replacement heart valve to function properly. I was told that I would only need to do this every month, but to tell the truth, it’s bloody hard to keep the results within the required parameters, so I decided, unilaterally, to do it every week.

And this is where, once again, Portugal is surprisingly efficient. Don’t believe everything you read about Portuguese inefficiency. It isn’t all true.

When it comes to blood tests, here in Portugal they seem to have an abundance of analysis clinics. For example, here in ‘little’ Fuzeta, there are two. So, every Tuesday, or occasionally Wednesday, I step out of my front door around 10:00am, head to Aqualab, arriving a couple of minutes after ten, step inside and await my turn. Well, to be honest, at this time of the morning, there’s rarely anyone else there, so I’m first in the queue, with no appointment necessary.

Five minutes later, having paid my €4.50 (yes, that really is all it costs) and having had my blood taken, I’m back outside once again.

The only downside is that I’m beginning to feel a bit like a pin cushion. A couple of weeks ago, the lady decided to start taking blood from my opposite arm due to the bruising on my original arm. But I’m hard. I can take it.

So yes, having my blood taken is cheap, quick and relatively painless.

‘But what about the results?’ I hear you ask.

Well, unbelievably, these are in my email Inbox by 13:30pm each time without fail. Bloody hell, I think the UK could learn a thing or two from the Portuguese when it comes to medical tests, exams and care.

Another example of this occurred a few weeks back, when I attended my twice-yearly visit to my GP, Dra Laura. As part of these visits, she always gives me a batch of tests to be done prior to my appointment, tests that I’ve gone into previously, I think. Suffice to say, they’re all-encompassing and free. Yet again, unbelievable.

But as a result of my results this time, Dra Laura notice something that made her think that I needed to have my kidneys checked, so she gave me a sheet detailing what was required and a list with three phone numbers on it, phone numbers of establishments that could do the necessary scanning.

Her words as I parted were:

‘Do this soon. You might have to wait three to four months until you can have the scan, and I would like to see your results on your next visit in six months’ time.’

‘Understood.’

So, I went home gave it a couple of days, and then checked the numbers via the Internet to see where I would have to go to have my scan. One of the numbers belonged to Radis in Olhão – perfect, I knew where that was. Then I had a brainwave. To be honest, due to my lack of Portuguese, I don’t particularly like using my phone, so I checked the Radis website for an email address and sent an email. Within the hour, I had a response, with an appointment for 9:00am the next morning. Blimey, you can’t ask for more than that can you? So much for Dra. Laura’s fears.

So yes, the next morning, I caught the train to Olhão and walked into ‘Radis’, to find the waiting area rather full.

‘Here we go…’ I thought.

But as I sat down, my name was called out and I was the first through the door and into the examination room. Blimey, result. Obviously, everyone else was a walk-in. My appointment had trumped them. Ten minutes later, I was outside again, having been told that everything looked good, and that I could pick up my results in a week’s time – which is what I did. And all of this cost me the big fat sum of zilch, nada, nothing. Will wonders never cease?

All I can say, well, reiterate, is that when it comes to medical tests, exams and care, Portugal is hard to beat.